Haute Tension (2003)

Tagline: Hearts will bleed.

Curiosity: At this point, I feel like I owe Scott a royalty check.

Plot: BFFs Marie (Cécile de France) and Alex (Maïwenn Le Besco) visit Alex’s family on their farm in rural France. Her parents are nice, and her brother has an adorable cowboy costume. THEIR LIVES ARE GREAT. Elsewhere, a burly man (Philippe Nahon) gets a blowjob from a severed head. HIS LIFE IS GREAT. Then their paths intersect when the man, known only as The Killer, slaughters Alex’s family and kidnaps her. It’s up to BFF Marie (and those who’ve seen the movie know how much I stress Marie’s love for Alex) to rescue her bud, stop the killer, and get out in one piece.

Thoughts: Holy bejeebits, this movie is intense. Director/co-writer Alexandre Aja, co-writer Grégory Levasseur, and make-up artist Giannetto De Rossi (Zombi, Dune, and motha-lickin’ Dragonheart ya’ll) rarely flinch in their depiction of The Killer’s depraved hyper-murders. Throats are slit, hands are cut off, kindly gas station attendants are axed for grabbing the wrong alcoholic beverage. There are buckets of blood galore. De Rossi’s effects are incredible, made all the most amazing since he was pretty much on his own during filming.

It’s kind of weird watching Aja talk about the film as if it isn’t extremely bloody, but he does have a valid point when he talks about Haute Tension: A good chunk of the film is also about the anticipation and terror that comes with waiting for The Killer’s next move. We know from the opening scene that Marie makes it out alive, but the score and shots make you forget that tidbit as she alternately hides and follows The Killer (or Le Tueur if you wanna be classy/French about it). The title translates to High Tension, which is the perfect title.

Much has been made of the recent “torture porn” label for horror movies, films that go to great lengths to degrade the human body without much substance. I’m not going to pretend Haute Tension is some sort of high art psychological commentary or something, but it’s still fair better than critics claimed to be at the film’s time of release. There’s a cohesive plot and a pretty good twist. As far as scary stories go, it’s better than average, with a stellar cast and crew to push it up as one of the best horror movies of the decade.

Reflection: “Blowjob from a severed head.”