Tagline: Part Elastic, Part Invisible, Part Fire, Part Stone.
Curiosity: It’s a ’90s adaptation of the Fantastic Four that was never meant to be released. Also, Roger Corman financed it, and that’s a name I’ve learned to trust.
Plot: Sciencey wunderkind Reed Richards (Alex Hyde-White) and his angry, European buddy Victor Von Doom (Joseph Culp) are trying to harness the power of a comet when it sort of kills Victor, possibly because Reed actually sucks ass at science. Ten years later, Reed tries his hand at SPACE SCIENCE yet again, this time ruining the lives of his best friend, Ben Grimm (Michael Bailey Smith), and his jailbait crush, Sue Storm (Rebecca Staab), as well as her kid brother, Johnny (Jay Underwood). Reed’s second botched experiment leaves him with enhanced elasticity; he can stretch and flex better than any other person outside of the porn industry. Sue can turn invisible and project force fields. Johnny can turn into some sort of human torch. And Ben… well, he got ugly. Oh, and super strong or whatever. They are… the Fantastic Four!
Thoughts: I feel bad for everyone involved in this movie. And I don’t mean that in a snarky “look at this crap” way either. When Constantin Film found itself on the verge of losing the film rights to the Fantastic Four comic book, they decided to make a quickie cheap-o on the fly so they could legally maintain ownership, even though the filmed result was never intended for public consumption. It was a sneaky idea, so sneaky that the studio never informed the cast or crew. So, I feel bad that they put in a month’s worth of work when they could’ve been out pursuing something that people might actually see.
I also feel bad because, if given a few script revisions and a bigger budget, The Fantastic Four might not actually be that bad. The film’s origin story is way more accurate than what ended up in the 2005 Fantastic Four film – Reed really did fuck over Victor, hence his hatred for the FF, which makes more sense than the “You stole my girlfriend, bro” plot from the ’05 reboot. Granted, the filmmakers later take creative liberties (Grimm can change into The Thing at will, for example), but overall, the picture’s biggest flaws are in the budget, not the story. Oh, and the acting. The acting is terrible.
But director Oley Sassone delivers pretty much everything I’d expect from a Fantastic Four movie – an origin story, displays of the superheroes’ powers, Doom being batshit insane, etc. Had he been given a little more money to, say, synch The Thing’s mouth with his audio or make the Human Torch look even remotely realistic, I would call it the best of the three FF films.
Reflection: Wow, I paid to see all three Fantastic Four movies. Also, Mercedes McNab (Harmony from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel) makes a brief appearance here as Young Sue Storm. Huzzah!
No comments:
Post a Comment