Braindead / Dead Alive (1992)

Tagline: Some things won’t stay down... even after they die.

Curiosity: Peter Jackson may have a bunch of Oscars on his mantelpiece now, but he was once a pretty gross horror/cult icon.

Plot: Set in 1957, Lionel Cosgrove (Timothy Balme) leads a fairly sheltered life under his mum’s (Elizabeth Moody) oppressive thumb when he Latin meets love interest Paquita (Diana Peñalver). They go on a date to the local New Zealand zoo, where Lionel’s mum is bitten by a Sumatran Rat-Monkey. The alleged product of a rat raping a monkey, the Rat-Monkey infects Mrs. Cosgrove, effectively turning her into a zombie. Ever the momma’s boy, Lionel tries to keep her condition hidden, but as her infection spreads to more people, that becomes a lonely, grisly goal.

Thoughts: Holy fucking shit. Jackson lets viewers know early on that he’s gonna go for gore, but that didn’t prepare me for this [skip to the six-minute mark if you want]:

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa he gets just the right mix of puss and blood. And that’s not even the grossest part! The film’s final 15 minutes or so are a symphony of bad taste (not to be confused with Jackson’s 1987 film, Bad Taste), not that I’d want to spoil anything. Braindead needs to be spoken of sparingly so as to preserve its shock value, but I will throw out some tidbits: “I kick ass for the Lord,” zombie sex, and the weirdest day in a park with a baby I’ve ever seen. I’m intentionally leaving out one particularly gross gag at the end, but surely the phrase “zombie sex” has already piqued you? Remember, once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

It’s because of the film’s ridiculously traumatic imagery that I found myself loving Balme in the lead role, though. As insane as the story gets, dude’s reactions during what must be the shittiest week in his life seem pretty plausible to me. And really, when this happens:

Wouldn’t you be making faces like this:

Reflection: My dad almost walked in on the zombie sex scene. So, that was fun.